It gets easier

   They say it gets easier as the kids get older. The tantrums, fussing, whining, “mommy this” and “mommy that”, and messes. They tell you that you’ll get it. I’ve even heard “it takes time”.
  Please stop. Stop saying it gets easier. I understand that but I’m struggling now. My mental health is struggling now. As mothers we’re told not to blink because it goes by fast yet you also say “it gets easier” so which is it? One sounds like I should live in the moment and the other sounds like I am wanting time to go faster so it gets easier. Not how it sounds to you? Let me try another approach.
  You’re listening to your toddlers screaming, home is a mess despite your efforts to clean it for the hundredth time this week, dinner didn’t go as planned, you clean up dinner and kids, and finally get the kids off to bed. You finally go to bed after finishing laundry and not even a few hours later you wake up to a crying child whom had an accident in bed. You get up to change the child’s bedding, get them back in bed and head back to bed yourself only to get up a few hours later with another child. Along with all these things, some moms have to work out of the home, have school, kids have school, daycare and/or child(ren) are in extracurricular activities. Sounds like a lot? It’s a lot on one person physically, mentally and emotionally.
  Does it get easier? Maybe but there’s still housework that needs to be done. There is still dinner that needs to be made. The children have to go to school and maybe so does the mother. Work still has to get done. A mother can take an “off day” from school or work or housework but she always has to come back to it and get it done. So don’t tell her “it gets easier” because that does nothing for her mental health. Ask her how you can help her. Go to her home and play with the kids so she can clean or nap. Offer to pick her kids up and take them to school if you’re able. A helping hand is much more appreciated than a statement that might make her feel like she should wish this time away for easier times.
   So from a mom waiting for things to get easier, please don’t tell me things I have heard a billion times over. Things don’t get easier, we just get used to the pressure and stresses.
*photo creds to Jessica Myres!*

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